Archive | January, 2017

I’m Still Standing

29 Jan

Most of my readers know how much I like to quote song lyrics.  One of my favorite Elton John songs is “I’m Still Standing” and recently, my boys have started singing it around the house because it was featured in the animated movie “Sing.”   It’s a great, upbeat song that says: 

“Don’t you know I’m still standing, better than I ever did. 

Looking like a true survivor, feeling like a little kid.

 I’m still standing after all this time,

Picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind.” 

That can mean so many different things to people, for whatever their struggle is.  For me, it’s alcoholism.   Sometimes I need to remind myself that I have been triumphant in my struggle and despite its power over me, I’m still standing strong.  I’ve been picking up the pieces of my life for several years now (actually 1706 days but who’s counting) and although I can’t say it’s without alcohol on my mind, it’s on my mind less frequently than when my journey into sobriety began. 

 I’m still standing after struggling to get through the holidays sober, surrounded by alcohol at a number of parties and events.  I’m still standing after some rough personal trials and tribulations.  I’m still standing after years of battling depression.  During the more difficult times, I rely more heavily on my sponsor and I am truly grateful for her help.  She makes sure I get to my meetings and work my 12-step program.  She makes me check in daily and give her a status report on my emotional sobriety.  Basically, she makes sure I’m still standing.  

 For me, the “still standing” also has a very literal meaning.  My go-to escape throughout my battle with alcoholism and depression has been hiding in my bed, isolating.  While it’s not a great way to handle things in life, it’s definitely better than what my escape used to be – alcohol.  On days when things are rough, I want to just pull the covers over my head and hide, and I often do.  But once again, I’m incredibly grateful to my sponsor and close friends who will pull me out, sometimes literally, sometimes just with a text, and let me know I need to get up and face the world and live my life.  You can’t look like a true survivor buried under your covers.  It’s the opposite of still standing.  I could write a song that says I’m still hiding, but I’m not sure that would go over very well and it certainly isn’t very inspirational.

 Whatever your struggle may be, give yourself a pat on the back for standing strong.  Somedays you may just have to be proud of yourself for getting out of bed.  It’s a good start.  We all have our times when we don’t feel like we have the energy or strength to stand tall.  And it’s okay to hide sometimes, but life goes on around us.  It’s better to participate in your own life, even when times are tough, than let it pass you by.  Stand strong.

 Be sure you put your feet in the right place, then stand firm.”  – Abraham Lincoln

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